Friday, March 30, 2007

The Pursuit of Happy Footed Tourists

So I watched three movies this week. Happy Feet, was cute and sickening, although I started getting a little bored near the end, but it's a kids movie so what can I say?

Turistas, was crap. It paints Brazil in a really bad light. I've been there and only had one or two small incedents, nothing gory and life threatening. This movie wasted over 50% of it showing bikini clad women and topless men walking through the jungle and swimming in caves. There was maybe 20 minutes of honest to goodness gore and action. I am sorry, but being chased by a guy with a spear through a series of underwater caves where I have to stop every 30 seconds to surface for air, is not thrilling. The worst thing that happened to me in Brazil, aside from being taken advantage of by a girl I think was a prostitute, was mainly my fault. Three of us were rolling a joint, and not wanting to be caught by the police, we tooka side street, in Salvador, at 3 in the morning. Within two minuites, four large brazilian men, were on us, trying to steal everything in our pockets. We ran, nobody lost anything, although I had to choke the hell outta one of them to get him off my buddy. Anyways, Brazil is fun if you are not an idiot. Turistas is fun only if you are an idiot.

Pursuit of Happyness (sic), always wanted to use that, was more like the pursuit of depressionness. It was a two hour downward slide of unhappy, sad occurances. Will Smith and his kid struggling to get through. Sure it has a happy ending, but you don't get to enjoy it. The happiness itself is only about 1 minute long. then the old, lets just put some words on the screen to show what happened in the future bullshit comes along. So I get to read that everything turned out well, but never actually see the characters enjoying the fruits of their labour. If I can't watch you enjoy the fruits, what good is that?

So, next week some good shit is coming out. I will of course rent them all. Blockbuster is being kept afloat by yours truly still. I have to let you know that Grindhouse is coming out next week and I may or may not have an actual erection with excitment over it. I don't think it will let me down.

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